FF Summary
The following is from some post or letter on RPGamer. It was a long time ago and I don't totally remember who posted it. If it was you, drop us an email or something.
Here you go:
I hope Axem 5 is happy. Any inaccuracies will be met with pleas of "I wrote it at 1:00 AM foor chrissakes."
I
Garland: I, Garland will knock you all down!
Guy in Red Armor: No you won't.
*He doesn't*
Garland: How about if I went back in time?
Guy with Big Hat: Yeah, that'd work.
*Chaos kills everyone*
II
Frionel: I'm Frionel, from the Kingdom of Fun!
Player: I spent eighty bucks importing this?
III
Onion Kid: I'm an onion kid!
Player: Screw this, I'm gonna go play Grand Theft Auto.
IV
Cecil: I'm a dark knight with a heart of gold.
*Kain betrays Cecil*
*A Party Member Dies, and then quickly returns*
Cecil: Now I'm a paladin with a stained soul.
*Kain betrays Cecil*
*A Party Member Dies, and then quickly returns*
Cecil: Now I'm an lunarian with a legacy of sorrow.
*Kain betrays Cecil*
*A Party Member Dies, and then quickly returns*
V
Lenna: I'm a princess!
Faris: I'm a princess! Y'arr!
Galuf: I'm not a princess, but I-
*Galuf Dies*
Cara: I'm a princess from another dimension!
Bartz: Better. Come, let us beat up a large tree!
L/F/C: Huzzah!
VI
Terra: I'm a mysterious yet lovable anime-styled character with a sorrowful past, raging against an evil empire.
L/E/S/C/S/C/S/S/R/M/G/U: Why, what a coincidence! So are we!
Terra: Let us create the archetype that for every RPG for the next eight years!
*They do. It totally rules.*
VII
Cloud: Bitch bitch bitch bitch bitch bitch bitch bitch bitch bitch bitch bitch bitch
Aeris: Alas, I am dead!
Cloud: Aw, man.
Sephiroth: Nyah nyah, you can't kill me.
*He does*
*Holy kills everyone*
VIII
Quistis: I love you, Squall!
Squall: Whatever.
*Bizarre and ultimately pointless flashback*
Rinoa: Me too! I love you Squall!
Squall: Whatever.
*Faye Wong product placement*
Seifer: You are kind of cute, you know.
IX
Zidane: Why do I have a tail again?
Kuja: BECAUSE YOU ARE ... A PUPPET.
Zidane: Oh, cool.
*Steiner jumps up and down amusingly*
X
*Nothing happens of any great consequence. For 50 goddamned house.*
XI
*Player1 has logged on to the server*
SEPHIROT69: SOL ME PLEASE!!!!!!!111
sxxxymaj: will gmb 2 fhw for 66 fdga+5
SEPHIROT69: SOL ME PLEASE!!!!!!!111
Patsfan: wheres the nude code
SEPHIROT69: SOL ME PLEASE!!!!!!!111
SEPHIROT69: SOL ME PLEASE!!!!!!!111
*Player1 has logged off server*