View source for The Ghetto Gourmet

Welcome to The Ghetto Gourmet; a repository for the recipes that require quantifiable measurements I actually need to look up... and then some experimental stuff in development.

BUT BEFORE YOU BEGIN, click [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r9uOQTcDURU&feature=use here]

The recipes denoted with an asterisk (*) are considered "Recipes for the Extra Ghetto" and people with little time/skill to devote to preparing healthy meals.

Per a recent request, I've added a section for [[User:Zahnnie|Zahnnie]] (who played a part in The Ghetto Gourmet through the college years) called "Zahnnie's High-Fallutin' Fancy-Pants Cookin' Section" which is where her collection of "recipes made to impress people" is located. [[User:Zahnnie|Zahnnie]]'s specialty is Moroccan cuisine, and she likes to cook things in her <s>vagine</s> tagine.

[[User:Caryatid|Caryatid]] included an awesome dietary analysis on one of my recipes which I thought added a lot of value. Unfortunately, I don't have the time to go through each and every recipe and analyze it in through detail, so I have now added simple assicon scaling as an easy way for people to tell which recipes are healthy here and which are... less so. Please refer to the following scale:

(!) - Skinny ass. Denotes recipes that would be good as part of a diet for people who are health-conscious or trying to lose weight. Relatively guilt-free eating.

(_!_) - Normal ass. Denotes recipes that are generally healthy, and meant to be enjoyed regularly.

(__!__) - Desk ass. Denotes recipes that should probably be enjoyed in moderation, lest you get desk ass.

x_x - Heart attack. Okay, I know this isn't technically an assicon, but it's more accurate than saying "wide load". Denotes recipes that I would recommend busting out as special treats, because including them as a regular staple in your diet will probably give you a heart attack.

==Savory Food==
[[Homemade Gyoza and Wontons]]* (_!_)

[[Miso Soup]]* (!)

[[Ghetto-Fantastic Ramen]]* (_!_)

[[Fried Rice]]* (_!_)

[[Chicken Pot Pie From Scratch]] (__!__)

[[Rosemary and Honey Salmon]]* (!)

[[Beef with Barley Soup]]* (_!_)

[[Chicken Soup/Plague Remedy]]* (!)

[[Spicy Ravioli Soup]]* (!)

[[Rice Porridge/Pukes And Shits Remedy]]* (!)

[["Porchetta Italiana" - Dirty Eye-talian Style Pork Loin]] (_!_)

[[Eggplant Parmesan]] (__!__)

[[Bruschetta with Salted Tomatoes]]* (!)

[[Shredded "Hash Brown" Potato Pile]]* (__!__)

[[Matar Paneer]] (!)

[[Paneer Korma]] (_!_)

[[Kickass Homemade Malaysian Lamb Curry]] (_!_)

[[Malaysian Chicken Curry that I Made While In AZ]] (_!_)

[[Improvements on Asian Home Gourmet's Laksa Recipe]] (_!_)

[[That Tasty Pot Roast That I Threw Up Behind Jim's Tent During The 2007 GNE War]] (_!_)

[[Moroccan-Spiced Stuffed Mushrooms]]* (_!_)

[[Salmon in a Puff Pastry Shell]]* (_!_)

[[Cheese 'Tatoes]]* x_x

[[Ghetto Cheese Ravioli with Chicken and Pesto Sauce]]* (_!_)

[[Ghetto Wonton-Noodle Soup]]* (_!_)

[[Creamy Carrot Soup]] (_!_)

[[Coconut Chicken Soup]] (_!_)

[[Ginger and Scallion Steamed Fish]] (!)

[[Ghetto-Fabulous Ma Po Tofu]] (_!_)

[[Tea Eggs]] (!)

[["Funky Chinese Herb" Stew]] (_!_)

[[Toss]]* (__!__)

[[Why-I-Am-Going-To-Hell Spinach]] (!)

[[Bill of Larder from the 2008 GNE War, Courtesy of Vance, Thunder Mountain's Favorite Camp Cookie]] x_x

[[Creamy Vegetable-Rice Soup/Fake Risotto]] (_!_)

[[Tasty Nasi Goreng made with Bamboe's Nasi Goreng spices]] (_!_)

[[Penang Curry with Basil]] (_!_)

[[Daikon Cake]] (_!_)

[[Heavenly Ghettalian Spaghetti Sauce]] (!)

[[See Krong Tord Gratium (Thai style Pork Spareribs with Crispy Garlic and Pepper)]] (__!__)

[[Takrite Goong (Lemongrass Sticks with Minced Chicken, Prawns, and Pork)]] (__!__)

[[Salmon and Spinach Quiche (aka "Quiche So Good, She'll Pretty Much Have To Put Out")]] x_x

[[Ghetto-Fabulous Spicy Tuna a la Waldrop]]* (!)

[[Panko-Breaded Fish with Ginger Sauce]] (_!_)

[[Black Bean Sauce Pork Roast, Courtesy of Marti]] (_!_)

[[Flippin' Sweet Spinach Dip]] x_x

[[Chicken and Corn Risotto (warning: not for cooks who are ADD)]] (_!_)

[[Thai Pickles]] (!)

[[Moderately Nutritious Taco Salad]] (!)

[[Sexy Homemade Tater Tots]] (!)

[["Toss My" Salad]] (!)

[[Chicken Turnovers]] (_!_)

[[The Cafe Congress' "Heartbreaker" Plate]] x_x

[[Beef Stew]] (_!_)

[[Efficient Broccoli & Rice]]* (!)

[[Holy-Crap-Good Cornbread]]* (!)

[[Poky Salad]]* (!)

[[Cafe-Style Chicken & Broccoli Alfredo]]* x_x

[[Lo Mai Gai (Lotus-wrapped Chicken with Sticky Rice)]] (_!_)

[[Soup for a Sick Day]]

[[Ghetto-Fraiche Lemon Tofu]]* (_!_)

[[Ghetto Coconut Noodle Soup]]* (_!_)

==Dessert==
[[Pie Crust]] (__!__)

[[Blackberry-Blueberry Pie]] (_!_)

[[Apple Pie]] (_!_)

[[Peach Pie with Star Anise]] (_!_)

[[Ginger Ice Cream]] (_!_)

[[Basil Ice Cream]] (_!_)

[[Krapp (Flambe)]] (__!__)

[[Dark Chocolate Cake]] (__!__)

[[Litterbox Cake]] (__!__)

[[Emme's Rum Balls]] (_!_)

[[Arschwein-Cookies]] (_!_)

[[Father-Hating-and-Shame Cookies]] (_!_)

[[Goth-Flavored Banana Bread]] (!)

[[The Best Carrot Cake Ever, According to Two California Hippies]] (!)

[[Sun-Ripened Mixed New Galen Field Browns]] (_!_)

[[Bienenstich]] x_x

[[Pandan-Banana Cake]] (_!_)

[[Delicious Fiber Bomb Bars]]* (!)

[[Hilary's Plum Torte]] (_!_)

[[Chocolate Oatmeal Cake]] (_!_)

[[Baked Apple-Thing]] (__!__)

[[Amanda's Mom's Cake]] (Red Velvet Cake filled with Grand Marnier-soaked Strawberries, covered in Homemade Creamcheese Frosting, Coconut and Almond Flakes) x_x

[[Horror at Pompeii (Rice Krispy Treats)]]* (__!__)

[[Perfect 10 Legendary Munchies-Satisfying Cranberry Chocolate Chip Muffins]] (__!__)

[[Hello Kitty Cake Pops]]

[[Ghetto Microwave Mochi]]

[[Baked Raw Cookie Dough]]

==Drinkies==
[[Tears of Baby Jesus]] (_!_)

[[Rear of Baby Jesus]] (_!_)

[[Amaretto Smoothie]] (__!__)

[[Official Recipe for a Lady DiSaronno]] (_!_)

[[Dirty Hippie Blackberry-Mango Smoothie]] (!)

[[How-I-Got-Registered-To-Vote-In-Cambridge Smoothie]] (!)

[[Vegan-Friendly Version of the How-I-Got-Registered-To-Vote-In-Cambridge Smoothie]] (!)

[[Coconut-Pandan Daiquiri]] (Creamy and yet dairy-free! For those of you who don't want your lactose intolerance flaring up and adding to the morning-after beer shits.) (__!__)

[[Eggnog (Johnson Family Recipe)]] (__!__)

[[Roger's Appletinis]] (!)

[[Spiced Pear]] (!)

[[Izzy's XXX Road Soda]] (!)

[[Courtney Love]] (!)

[[Izzy's Bloody Mary]]

[[Cheapo Fruity Mimosa]] (!)

[[Poolside Sangria]] (!)

[[Tranny Chaser]]

[[The Main Event Cosmos]]

'''<u>Le Bunghole Homebrews:</u>'''

[[Arschwein Beta Version]] (_!_)

[[Arschwein Version 1.0]] (_!_)

[["Djarum Black" Mead Beta Version]] (_!_)

[[The Award-Winning Gargamel]] (_!_)

[[Infamous Bathtub Mead|Infamous Bathtub Mead (latest recipe has moved here until further notice)]] (_!_)

[[Viking Breakfast (Bacon Acerglyn)]] (_!_)

==Misc==
[[Awesome Fake Satay Sauce]] (_!_)

[[Mutie's Honey Butter Recipe]] x_x

[["Special Sauce"]] x_x

[[Guacamole]] (_!_)

[[Tzatziki]] (!)

[[Extra-salty Soy-Garlic Marinade]] (__!__)

[[Extra-salty Soy-Ginger Marinade]] (__!__)

[[Creamy Fake Vomit]] x_x

[[How To Make a Bacon Candle]] x_x

[[Oatmeal-Raisin Cardboard]] (!)

[[Homemade Turkey Broth]] (_!_)

[[Bizkits]]* (_!_)

==Zahnnie's High-Fallutin' Fancy-Pants Cookin' Section==
With the recipes that follow, you will be able to easily convince your family and friends that you are a totally awesome cook, when in fact you're just making it up as you go. Never reveal this crucial secret.

[[GGZ_Baked Potato Soup | Baked Potato Soup]] so good you just may cream your pants.

[[GGZ_Moroccan Lamb | Moroccan Lamb Tagine]]

[[GGZ_Gnocchi | Homemade Gnocchi]]

[[GGZ_SausageLeekRagu | Sausage and Leek Ragu]] to go with the gnocchis. Mmm.

[[GGZ_SausageLeekSoup | Sausage and Leek Soup]] inspired by the ragu. For the crockpot for extra laziness!

[[GGZ_Boozesicles | Boozesicles]] made especially by the lovely Zahnnie for Ubernerd's Tarts 'n Vicars/Good-Decisions party