TGAOL Cast

The Mains

The main characters are ex-villains, trying to begin a normal life. Well, the Bish is trying to have a normal life, anyway. He developed a sibling relationship with Hilarity and tries to keep her out of trouble.

The Bish

Main Character. Real Name: Gene (possibly Eugene?) Long White/blue hair. Colored contacts. Powers of suggestion. Possibly other powers, including a sword. Actually trying to retire from being a super-villain and live a normal life. As a SV, dressed well and was very stylish. As a normal guy, he’s got a techie job and dresses down, and is consciously trying to not use his powers of suggestion when progressing with his job. Owns a house in the burbs, 2 car garage, a hybrid car, and a motorcycle. He always wears contacts (of different colors) except for Holloween, of course (don't know what his natural eye color is...) He's working for an evil technology conglomerate bent on world domination via a mega-death-ray. He doesn’t know this when he goes to work there. But hey, they have good benefits. Age 32.

Hilarity

Mechanic. Real Name: Alyssa P. Hacker. Cute busty Asian girl with glasses who lives in the Bish’s basement and builds stuff. She was his mad scientist/mechanic when he was a SV, and always had an escape plan, in addition to notes about how his plans were susceptible to failure, although she managed to forget to show them to him until after the plans had failed. Every time. In the house, Alyssa is the gamer and occasionally has her D&D group over for games. They are stereotypical geeky gamers. Very Kaylee/Lucca based--has occasional horny moments which, while they are never directed at the Bish, they make him twitchy/uncomfortable. Age 20.

Constant Roomates & Aquaintances

These guys will constantly appear. We're still deciding if they'll become main or secondary characters.

Shiggy

Hothead Magician, Over confident. He thinks he has rapier wit—he doesn’t, he just switches between catch-phrases regularly. Recycler wit, perhaps. Likes to dress in bright colors—not so good for sneaking around. Believes magic is greater than all, and doesn’t understand why anyone would use technology. Tries to ignore magical side effects. Decent looking, but constantly using magic to shore up perceived physical faults. Bish used to use him as the “ugly friend” on the dating scheme and Hothead never caught on. Might at some point have a random one-night-stand with Alyssa at her initiation. At some point breaks something that Alyssa was working on, and gets the shit beaten out of him promptly thereafter. Half-elven? Age 31.

Mayhem

Stealth bitch. Real Name: Kristen Hacker. Rogue-type older sister of Alyssa. Wears tight leather catsuits with inappropriately placed zippers but uses chameleon and silence powers to sneak around so it wouldn’t matter what she was wearing. Bish’s ex-girlfriend—they get into shouting matches when she comes around to get her little sister to build stuff from the plans she’s stolen. Constantly brings things up from their previous lovelife to finish arguments. Bish occasionally comments on her dressing like a hooker and not allowing her “clients” into his house. She gives her little sister sexy underwear as presents in the hopes of getting her to dress up a little more. Age 29.

The Ant

Big Lug. Can lift 40 times his body weight. Has a costume with mandibles and stuff. Makes grumbling comments about being smarter than everyone, and knows a lot of trivia and has a huge vocabulary, but actually isn’t all that smart and doesn’t know much about planning. Believes the reason people don’t listen to him is because they think he’s just big and dumb. Age 40.

Character Issues and Relationships

Bish is old/Age relationships

So, yeah, Bish is not really a bishounen. This has to be pointed out to him by someone who actually speaks Japanese, or is just a big friggin Anime fan. Possibly Hilarity (possibly her sister, Mayhem). Bishounen refers to "beautiful young man or boy" and it basically limited to those under the age of 20. When it is pointed out to him, he gets visibly perturbed.

Additionally, Mayhem is nearing 30. Thus as much as she tries to tease Bish about his age (which he finds terribly unfair, as he "doesn't look a day over 25") he can always retort with one word: sagging.

The Ant has to provide some amount of reality--it doesn't matter that they're not teenagers anymore. As much of a dork as he can be when challenged by a real intellect, he also has the wisdom that comes with having seen a bunch of stuff, and he has to eventually point out that the teasing going on about the 30th birthday milestone is really trivial, and juvenile. Except he'll use bigger words.

Then there's Hilarity, who's the baby of the group. Can't even drink yet (legally) (not that anyone cares.) Bish has known her since she was little, like 12 or something. He didn't exactly "rescue" her so much as kidnap her from a rival villain and give her a big lab to go to town on. They have the sibling relationship. Possibly it was some drama involving Hilarity that led to him abandoning his villainous ways (or retiring, as he puts it). Part of the evolution of their relationship will be him coming to terms with the fact that she's not a little girl.

Bish and Hilarity

Bish treats Hilarity like a little sister. He's taken it upon himself to help her get out of her old villain ways and into...something better.

Hilarity loves to annoy Bish by talking about things he doesn't want to hear about. She rattles on about feminine hygiene products, or pokes holes in his arguments, or tell him why his plan was doomed to fail--after it fails--complete with diagrams and notes.

It's possible that some dramatic event involving the two of them is what inspired Bish to get out of villainy--that is, if the comic ever wants to pretend to be serious.

Various roommates that come and go

Most of these guys will be used for a quick joke, and then will be told to go (and by go, I mean get kicked out.)

Spot

Has the power to mind-control Dalmatians, up to 101 at a time. Also can speak to dogs and is trying to take over the world by turning dogs against their owners. Solely for the joke of "Out, damn Spot" when he's evicted.

The Hippy

Filthy hippie. Has a secret plot to put LSD in wonderbread.

Super-Heroes

Most superheroes will serve as adversairies. They usually want to expose Bish's past, or capture him. They're a bit too good-doing in one angle or another, though. Some are trying to capture the badguy who escaped justice and must pay for past crimes. Some still think he's in the badguy racket, and want to prevent him from his next crime. And some just get a weird vibe from him.

The Maid

An undercover super-hero-wannabee who's trying to come up with proof that Bish is plotting something evil so that she can catch him and become a real super-hero.

Mr. Bad Luck

A trivial super-hero who is after Bish to make him pay for past misdeeds. Causes him to have a really, really bad day.

Irate Dandylion

A radiation experiment gone wrong by a lab accident, she is a sentient humanoid dandylion who calls up earth powers and stuff. She fights the oppression of Kentucky bluegrass. She and Bishie get into conflicts because he has hay fever.

Super-hero, two doors down

Some random superhero with a secret identity. Has very little to do directly with Bish.

Plucky Reporter

Her father was a 7th son, and she has 6 older brothers. She is very lucky. She knows that someone on this block is a hidden super-hero, and has become fixated on Bish. ‘Cause, well, bishie.

Super-stealth hero

Has been tracking the Bish and thinks he's somehow in charge of the evil company he's just working for. He's sneaky and batman-like, except for the part where he just doesn't get some very obvious things. Like how Bish is really retired.

Hero out for revenge

Superhero whose brother went insane when he was disqualified from the bishie contest. Has sworn revenge for what Bish has done.