Alternity Summaries

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Run 1 
We're miners! Whoops, the mine fell in. Whoops, a warbeast. FIGHT! ESCAPE! Now we are friends!
Run 2 
Let's have booze. Ah, a ship, eh? Let's go get it. Whoops, pirates! Oh, we are fine. Whew!
Run 3 
Man, this place kind of sucks. Hey look it's our ship! Oooooh it's so pretty... look look look. Fix fix fix. Pretty crystals! Whoops possessed! Whoops stabbed! Whoops Jax is here!
Run 4 
We have to take Jax where? Okay, I guess... Jax and Gerd play hide and seek. OMG STEAK THIEF!!! Take that, steak thief. Kamir guards the steak bush. Oh noes, out of Starfall too soon! What's this button? Arive on time! We're winners!
Run 5 
Let's supply the ship. Whoops merchants are mean! (Though they do like sex bots.) Hmm... how about we scavenge this thingie? OMG SPIKESPORES *smash*. Oooh, a cryo chamber. Opens in a month and a half? Aww!
Run 6 
On to our next dude then. Huh, he is kinda crazy. Oh well. SHOPPING! Now we go survey a system. Hey what's that? Gerd: "Hey, I can talk to it! NONO DON'T EAT US!" Whoops crashed! Where'd one of our engine go?!
Run 7 
Let's explore this desert. Engine asplode?! Let's go over there. OMG mutants! Let's go to the doctor. Whoops trap!
Run 8 
AIEEEE RUN! Zap zap robots! Gravity going crazy! Giant doom-bot! PHANTOM SPACEMAN! Oh thank god, we saved the... uhoh. TEAM DIPLOMAT AWAAAAAAY! We win!
Run 9 
Tyco gave us phat lewt! Cyrum jerk ganked us and took Marcus AND blackmailed us! Gird left, waaaaaaaaah! Hey, the cryo tube's opening a month early, whut? 2 PEOPLE inside (one of them the new PC)? NOT LESBO PR0N. At least we can open the captain's quarters and watch his last words. Oh yeah, we got full control of the Sapphire! Yaaaaay!