That Tasty Pot Roast That I Threw Up Behind Jim's Tent During The 2007 GNE War

Everybody's been asking me about this recipe and why I haven't put it up. I guess it must be the title that makes it so darn appealing. Honestly, I think the story is worth more than the actual recipe itself, but for posterity, I'm going to record the recipe here. This is a camping recipe which uses a dutch oven (heh heh heh, everyone say it with me. "Dutch oven") and hot coals or an open flame. Credit goes to the illustrious "Vance" for creating this delectable dish on Saturday evening of the 2007 Great Northeastern War, which he found again in a pile behind his tent the morning after, courtesy of myself, the House Thunder victory party, and wee bit too much mead. I tried to express my remorse for losing such a well-crafted meal so close to his sleeping quarters but frankly, there's not a lot you can say the morning after you wake up in a bush.

Ingredients:

2 onions

5 carrots

3 lbs beef chuck (or other boneless pot-roast quality meat)

1 bottle of water

5-10 tbsp garlic (however much it takes to coat the roast)

3 tbsp salt

Tools:

1 dutch oven

1 grill (if you have it)

Take the beef and slice cross-hatching across the top. Rub it down with a whole lot of garlic and grill each side to give it some flavor (no need to actually cook the meat this way - this step is, after all, optional if you don't have a grill but it just makes things taste better). Place the roast in the dutch oven. Coarsely chop the onion and the carrots and arrange the pieces around the meat in the dutch oven. Pour in the water and sprinkle in the salt, then cover and place the oven into your trashcan fire (or whatever you are using to contain your open flame) and bury it in hot coals. Wait around and drink for 1 to 2 hours, singing awful off-key drinking songs and calling each other names, then open the dutch oven and enjoy the pot roast/beef stew. It is not advisable to continue to eat more stew if you happen to wander back into your own camp after a night of hard drinking and bellydancing around a bonfire as you, too, may find yourself expelling your meal violently behind your good friend's tent (and let me tell you, this pot roast is hard on the esophagus).

• Note: All measurements in this recipe are approximate because it is a camping recipe. If there isn't enough water to half-cover the vegetables and meat in your dutch oven, feel free to add some more. Anyone who was involved in the making of this tasty stew who remembers more exact measurements, feel free to comment and I will adjust the recipe accordingly.