Vegan-Friendly Version of the How-I-Got-Registered-To-Vote-In-Cambridge Smoothie

"Mmm... sounds good. What do you put in the smoothie?"

"Uh, frozen raspberries, peaches, frozen yogurt, honey, and..."

"I can't have frozen yogurt, it has dairy."

"Ah, okay, got it. No frozen yogurt."

"Oh, and please no honey. It's cruel to the bees."

"..."

Ingredients:

3-4 ice cubes

1/2 a banana

1 cup frozen peach pieces

1 cup frozen raspberry pieces

1 cup orange juice

2 tsp sugar

Tools:

1 mediocre-quality dorm-kitchen blender

Throw the ice cubes into the blender and pulse until ice cracks up into coarse chunks. Toss in the rest of the ingredients and blend away just until you have a fluffy, crushed ice-based smoothie. Don't blend it for too long or let the ice cubes melt all the way, or you will end up with liquid slush. Pour everything into a pint glass and serve right away. Receive voter registration documents in the mail several days later as a reward for your efforts.